Posts Tagged ‘banana gum’


This is a revised Hub I wrote several years ago. It took awhile but the Hub eventually picked up momentum & made quite an impact on its popularity (positive & negative). It was written for entertainment purposes only, but – uh, that didn’t mean it wasn’t tested. Does it work or doesn’t it…? You decide.

Homemade Banana Gum

Psychedelic; LSD Effects
It Originated in Northwest Indiana

In the 1990’s there was rumor going around in Northwest Indiana (Lake, Porter, LaPorte, Newton & Jasper counties) about this “banana gum”. And no, it’s not a name brand banana flavored product you buy at a store. This banana gum is special. Really special. In fact, it’s so special that it’s been known to cause psychedelic/LSD effects on those who are daring enough to actually chew it.

Trust me, from experience, you DO NOT want to try this.

Banana Gum Has Never Been Officially Tested

Nobody Really Knows

Since there hasn’t been any official study on banana gum, the actual organic reaction to why it gives off a psychedelic/LSD affect is still a mystery. Like most scientific experiments, the process of making homemade banana gum must be handled with extreme care & delicacy.

banana-42793

 

Banana Gum Incubation Timetable

Incubation Time
Affect on Brain
Symptoms
Before 2 weeks
no effect
none(?)
2 weeks – 3 weeks
normal effect
hallucinations
4 weeks – 7 weeks
advanced effect
hallucinations/possible insanity(?)
8 weeks – 12 weeks
abnormal effect
insanity
Longer than 3 months
unnatural effect
?

The Banana Gum Process

It’d probably be best to use latex gloves but not necessary. Before the following steps are to be taken, a well  chewed piece of gum is needed. Any type of gum will do, but gum that’s recommended by the American Dental Association is said to work best.

Dentist gum

Dentist recommended gum works best

  1. Get a banana. The greener the better (but not too green)
  2. Peel/slice the banana open, carefully & slowly remove the banana without damaging the “insane vein”. Insane Vein
  3. Take the chewed piece of gum (preferably your own) and gently…AND I CAN’T EXPRESS THIS ENOUGHgently & carefully fold it around what is called the “insane vein”. Form the gum before if you have to – just don’t fold the gum over itself.
  4. Now carefully place the banana back in its peel.
    NOTE: The less it takes to peel the banana & remove it the better.
    Try not to break the banana, if it does it’s okay, just place the piece(s) back together.
  5. Wrap the banana in aluminium foil covering it completely. Don’t spare the foil!
  6. Hang the banana at least 18″ from its stem someplace dark. Absolutely no sunlight.
  7. Please follow the INCUBATION TIME TABLE listed above exactly.

Banana Gum Stories

STORY ONE:
The Man on the Other Side of the Park

YEAR: 1994
LOCATION: Harrison Park, Hammond, IN

Under the influence of this so-called “banana gum” I decided to take an evening stroll through the park. I’m pretty sure there’s a city ordinance about being at a park after dusk, but I didn’t care. I had this urge to leave; be somewhere else, so I decided the park would be the best place.

Fortunately, the local law enforcement was never involved throughout this entire ordeal. I was lucky too because I decided to hang out near this huge, orange monument near the corner of Hohman Avenue – a common route used by the Hammond police. Not only is this monument huge, but it’s bright orange…hello? To describe it without pictures, it’s like some sort of a giant head, but done in an an abstract/artsy way. It actually looks pretty cool.

So, anyway, here I am sitting on the ledge that surrounds this huge, orange head, and somehow, I notice a person like on the other side of the park. I kept looking and though he was very, very, very far away I could see this person standing there. Was this the affects of banana gum? Super sight?

I just sat on that ledge and stared. I didn’t even move. I even slowed my breathing. I knew that it person because I noticed sometimes they would move They would move like they were about to walk away, but then decide to stay where they were at. I squinted my eyes to see if I could get a better view. By doing so, after awhile, I noticed that they checked their watch. Well, at least it was a movement that what looked like to me someone checking their watch. It was then that I thought for sure that it was man – definitely.

I watched this man what seemed like a half hour before I realized that it started to look as though he was looking back at me. After all this time, this guy finally noticed me sitting way over here – on the other side of the park. I have to admit I was a bit startled.

I sat up when I noticed that he was starting to walk towards me. He was walking to me as if he knew me. You know that walk I’m talking about…? When somebody sees you from like the other side of a large room; like an auditorium?
No?

Oh well.

So, anyway, this guy has this certain walk to him. Now, my first reaction was to get the hell up and go home. But before I did so, the closer he got to me I began to notice that he was smiling. Was he smiling because he knew me and was surprise to see me hanging out by the huge, orange head? Or was he just a smiling stranger that was about to come over and “shoot-the-shit” with me? Now I couldn’t tell if this guy was black, white, whatever, but I could tell that he was smiling.
I know.
Weird.

I decided to stick it out and wait for this guy to come over. It took awhile – like I said, he was on the other side of the park. Meanwhile, all kinds of things were going through my banana gum infested brain. My safety being number one.

man-85.jpg

He was getting closer now. I could make out that he was a white guy. He was wearing a dark suit with a white shirt & tie and dark pants. He still had that walk to him though. It reminded me of a salesperson if that helps at all with the description. It was driving me crazy.

STOP WITH THAT WALK ALREADY!

We were in speaking distance now. Who’s gonna speak first?
Me?
Him?
It was me.

“Wassup?”
This was a common greeting that was said between Generation X er’s.

“Hey. What’s going on?” he answered.

“Not much.”

He jumped on the ledge a few feet away from me. I wasn’t looking at him but I could still see him in my side vision. I forgot what that’s called – it’s on the tip of my tongue.
Forget it.

Then there was silence. You could only hear the traffic from Hohman Avenue. I took a glance at the traffic (opposite direction from where he was sitting) and I started to feel a bit awkward. It’s been like a minute or two and we haven’t said anything to each other. I tried to think of something…anything to say, but nothing. But then I heard what sounded like as if he was sliding off the ledge. I quickly turned toward him, but he was gone.

No shit.

I. Freaked. Out.
I went straight home and stayed there promising to never try banana gum again.

I should also mention that I’m not very good with keeping promises with myself.

Until next time,
James Timothy Peters